Merry Christmas!

Thursday, December 25, 2014

As usual, this has been a wonderful Christmas season.  It really is my favorite time of year.  The lights, the music, the movies and tv specials, spending time with family, lots of food and general relaxation.   Of course there are always those moments of hectic craziness thrown in, but overall I think there is no better time of year.

None of that has changed this year, but at the same time it is all quite different.  With my boyfriend so far away, those happy feelings have a slightly somber shadow now.  I've never celebrated Christmas with a significant other, but that was always by choice and not by circumstance.  Now, when I would love to do so, I can't.  We were able to skype this morning to open presents, but as nice as that was I still found myself tearing up multiple times.

It's funny that although I'm not doing anything different than I have in years past, it all feels so... wrong.  Not having him here to celebrate, to open gifts, to sit down to dinner... it just makes something that has been so normal for 27 years suddenly feel incomplete.

Of course I have to keep reminding myself that although it is miserable to be apart at this time a year, I am so lucky to feel as strongly as I do and to know that he feels the same.  There are hundreds of reasons why I wish this deployment didn't happen, but I cannot forget the fact that, without this, I may not have realized how much I truly want this person in my life.  I also know that every moment we spend together when he is home again will be appreciated a hundred times more because of all the moments we spent apart.

All of that being said, I still had a great Christmas.  I'm so grateful for everyone and everything I have in my life today.  Plus, It's really hard not to love Christmas when you get to watch a two year old open a million Frozen gifts and squeal with joy with every single one.

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